How Building Your Barbie Dreamhouse Helps You Reimagine Work That Fits
The Momentum Files #58
How to Create the Career You Actually Want
This past spring, I was sitting at my son’s college graduation when I heard a message that resonated deeply:
“Don’t just live your life. Go create it.”
What If You Built the Life You Actually Wanted?
This message made me think: what if we all took the time to build the life and career we actually want - whether we’re just stepping out of college or further along in our careers?
I was glad that the graduates were hearing such a powerful reminder as they entered into the next chapter of their lives.
And as I listened, I couldn’t help but think how much this call to create - not just accept - matters for seasoned professionals, too.
Because whether you’re 22 or 52, in transition or on the verge of growth, the choice to create your next chapter is always yours.
What I’ve learned from working with so many professionals is this:
“When we choose the transition, how we experience it is completely different than when we don’t.”
And even when the change wasn’t your choice, like a layoff or a restructure, you still get to choose what you build next.
🔹 What if you gave yourself the space to create the next thing instead?
🔹 What if you designed it like you were building your own dream house?
That was the focus of a recent Career Club conversation, where I shared a favorite metaphor we use often: the Barbie Dreamhouse.
You might remember it - the pink convertible, the elevator, the rooftop deck.
Back in college, as an Assistant Manager at a toy store, I once spent an entire day putting together the Barbie townhouse for the display window.
It wasn’t just snap-together. I had to step back, redo parts, and keep adjusting.
It’s the same now - creating a meaningful career takes intention, patience, and vision.
In Career Club, building your Barbie Dream House is our shorthand for the personalized, purpose-driven work life you truly want. The beach view is optional. But the visioning isn’t.
It goes beyond simply avoiding what drains you, or settling for “remote” or “pays the bills.”
🔹 It’s the work that lights you up.
🔹 That feels aligned with your values.
🔹 That uses your gifts and lets you grow.
I find myself saying this a lot - because it’s true:
“You have to make the Dreamhouse so big and beautiful that it pulls you forward.”
This metaphor isn’t about chasing perfection.
It’s about choosing possibility.
And giving yourself permission to clarify your priorities and pursue what you really want.
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If you want a guided exercise for visualizing your ideal work life, check out this powerful resource.
“Who Is Your Future Self and Why This Is an Important Question,” where I walk you through powerful self-visualization techniques.
Start Where You Are: From “I Don’t Want” to “I Do Want”
Many of my clients come from a place of burnout or disappointment.
When you’re hurting or feeling stuck, it’s often easier to name what you don’t want:
🔹 I don’t want to work for a micromanager.
🔹 I don’t want to commute an hour each way.
🔹 I don’t want to be in a toxic work culture.
That’s a powerful starting point.
And if you’re unsure of where to even begin, ask:
🔹 What don’t I want anymore?
🔹 What isn’t working?
🔹 What have I outgrown?
These are important clues.
Even small signs of dissatisfaction are guideposts pointing you somewhere new.
From there, we flip it into what you do want:
🔹 I want a manager who trusts me.
🔹 I want flexibility or remote work.
🔹 I want a culture where I can thrive.
This is how you begin to furnish your Dreamhouse - one room at a time.
These statements become the early framework for a career that reflects your evolving values and goals.
And that clarity is what begins to pull you forward.
“We change for two reasons, to escape pain or pursue joy. Most of us begin our transition trying to get away from pain. But if we want to truly thrive, we have to build something that pulls us forward.”
Celebrate Micro-Wins and Build Momentum
As you explore what you don’t want and what you do want, it’s important to notice and celebrate the small wins along the way.
When you’re navigating career transition or growth, it’s easy to focus on what’s missing - the job you don’t have yet, the promotion that hasn’t come, or the change that feels slow.
That mindset can make progress feel invisible and drain motivation.
A powerful alternative is to focus on micro-wins.
These are the small steps that signal forward motion, such as:
🔹 Sending a networking email or follow-up
🔹 Completing a short skill-building exercise
🔹 Updating one section of your LinkedIn profile or resume
🔹 Reflecting on your values or clarifying your “I want” statements
Each micro-win reinforces progress, builds confidence, and reminds you that career transition is a process, not an overnight leap.
Even when the next big move feels far away, these small victories are proof you’re on the right path - and they’re exactly what propel you to your next opportunity.
When Survival Has to Come First
It would be wonderful if we could all drop everything and pursue our dream careers right away. But life doesn’t always work that way.
Sometimes you have to take a "transition job" to pay the bills or stabilize after a hard experience.
One Career Club member shared:
“I just need something right now… I might need to downsize the pool and add an atrium.”
We all laughed, because it was so real - sometimes the Dreamhouse needs a temporary remodel.
Your Dreamhouse can evolve.
You can shift the blueprint as your needs shift. The key is not forgetting that you get to build it. Even if it takes longer than planned.
Another participant reflected on this in a different way:
“It’s such a good attitude adjustment and such a good reminder, because it's very, very easy to stand in kind of pain and say, ‘this is better,’ because I might go to really bad pain.”
That nuance really resonated.
Sometimes we stay in something “better than before” because we fear worse, not because it’s truly what we want.
Progress isn’t the same as alignment.
Once you’ve stabilized, you get to ask: what would thriving look like now?
Even when you have to prioritize survival first, keeping your Dreamhouse vision in mind ensures you’re moving toward something meaningful.
It Takes Time to Build Something Great
Building something meaningful - especially during transition - takes time, reflection, and iteration.
Just like when I built that Barbie display back in college, you sometimes have to step back, redo parts, and keep adjusting.
Your Dream Career isn’t built in an afternoon.
It’s built by clarifying your priorities and defining your vision.
A Client Story: From “Not Toxic” to Truly Aligned
One Career Club member - a Continuous Improvement and Strategic Planning leader - shared how, after leaving a toxic workplace, her first goal was simple: find something that wasn’t harmful.
“What tends to happen, at least in my experience with it, is that it was kind of like, okay, it's not toxic. But there is a point where you have to be like, wait a second. Not being toxic isn't exactly enough, or what I want for my career, right?”
Her insight resonated deeply with the group.
When you've been in survival mode for so long, simply being in a neutral or safe environment can feel like a win. And sometimes, it is a necessary step.
As I reflected back to her and the group,
“It wasn’t the ultimate goal, but it met the need in that moment. It gave you stability so you could get to this next question: what do I really want now?”
This is exactly where our Don’t Want / Do Want exercise becomes so powerful. It creates space to move beyond survival and into intentionality - beyond escaping what’s wrong to designing what’s right.
For this client, and many others, that shift was a turning point: from reacting to her career- to creating it.
If you liked this journey from survival to intention, you’ll find similar inspiring shifts in “How Career Club Helped a Client Take a Big Step.”
You’re Still the Architect
The truth is, building your Barbie Dream Career isn’t about perfection - it’s about progress.
You’re allowed to start where you are. You’re allowed to revise the blueprint. And you’re still the architect.
Even if life required a detour or a delay, the dream is still yours to build.
When you start clarifying your priorities - what you’re moving toward, not just away from - you stop reacting and start creating.
That’s the shift that changes everything.
So, what’s the first room you’ll design in your Dreamhouse - and what’s one step you can take this week to start building it?
Key Takeaways
Transition is emotional. Whether chosen or not, it can shake your sense of control and direction.
Clarity begins with honesty. Even one insight - like “I never want to be micromanaged again” - can spark meaningful change.
Vision pulls you forward. Without it, it’s easy to settle for “not toxic” instead of reaching for truly fulfilling work.
You don’t have to leap all at once - but you do have to define your vision.
This is a journey. Even a list, a sketch, or a single conversation can become the start of your career blueprint.
Lessons Learned
You still have agency. Even when change wasn’t your choice, you can define your next steps.
Start with what you don’t want. Then flip it to discover what you do want.
Your dream career doesn’t have to be built all at once - but it does have to be yours.
Let your vision be big enough to pull you forward - and be willing to modify as life unfolds.
Stabilizing steps are sometimes necessary - but don’t let temporary become permanent.
Healing and clarity take time. Give yourself grace, then take aligned action.
CTA’s
Two free guides to help you move forward, wherever you are in your career journey
📘 The Brilliant Networking Formula
Build relationships with confidence and clarity.
Perfect for job seekers, career pivoters, and those ready to grow their network intentionally. Includes scripts, reflection prompts, and strategies that actually work.
🛠️ The Post-Layoff Success Guide
If you’ve recently been laid off, this guide will help you reframe what’s next.
Includes the five beliefs that hold people back after a layoff, and how to break through with clarity and momentum.
Want Support in Building Your Dream Career?
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